The New Year is a time for reflection, resolutions and goal setting. The one area I work hard on with my athletes is the development of coping skills. My aim is to make sure that in 6-12 months’ time if they were presented with the same challenges as they are today, they would have the tools to better deal with them than might do at present.
Resilience is such a buzz word at the moment, but it is just a word. To me it simply means you get back up after being knocked down. But who wants to live like that, I would rather people focus on what skills are required to get back up or more importantly to prevent themselves from getting knocked down in the first place.
One of the most important skills someone can learn is perspective.
The idea for this article came a few months ago when I was talking to a newbie runner about the possibility of them completing the fun 5 at the Black hill trail run. They had done some park runs and they loved nature, so we thought this would be a good extension. That was until we had a look at the course profile. It was full of jagged peaks and plenty of climbing! Enough to send a shiver through their mind.
While I tried to talk it up that they would be fine if they employed strategies like, finding ways to enjoy the environment, run with others or breaking the course up, it was only when I thought “what does the longer run on the day look like” that we learnt about perspective. Their fun 5 course was at the start of the long race, and while on its own the Fun 5 hills looked extremely menacing, when it was included as a part of the main race, it barely looked like a pimple. The main race had seriously long climbs with many over 30%. Suddenly the Fun 5 didn’t look so bad and was maybe even possible.
So, when you feel as if you are faced with a challenge too big to overcome, applying a little bit of perspective can help. Yes, I have had my fair share of injuries over the years, but when I recently learnt that one of my triathlon heroes is facing a life sentence through cancer it puts it in perspective. They are trying to live their life to the fullest, still racing bikes, but the reality is their condition is terminal.
Likewise, within the Lakers family a past member is also having to deal with her only son fighting cancer. When you hear these stories, you certainly look at your own relationship with your kids differently. Perspective makes you realise you still have lots to be thankful for , things to look forward to and that there is always someone who is doing it tougher.
Once before a session I had a client complain about a physical problem they were facing. While I couldn’t help them with their condition, I wanted to show them that they weren’t alone and that in any group everyone is battling some challenges, so I said “I am battling the worst case of infected haemorrhoids (yes I know a little too much information) in history” that made life extremely uncomfortable (I couldn’t sleep for weeks on end and the pain was a 10 out of 10) and no sooner than I said that someone else made comment that they too had haemorrhoids and another said they had just got over a infected testicle that had it swell up to the size of an orange.
Perspective is about looking beyond your own world. It can make you realise you are not alone. Everyone is battling something, whether it be physical, psychological, financial or with relationships. Reaching out for help is an important first step as too is developing some coping skills to make yourself more resilient.
Fortunately, I have learnt that almonds don’t agree with my GI system, so I have avoided going down my pathway again! However, if you are struggling this is the time for working, either on your own or preferably with others, to develop skills that will enhance your coping abilities. While there are some physical things you can do to boost your capacity, most of the skills are about controlling our mind, learning skills to get it working for you, not against you.
For me it is about making sure that you are developing as a person. If something is lingering, then it is time to get help and act. If you have been sitting on your hands for a while, then remember “Procrastination hates Action” so make 2024 a time to Act. Set some goals and see what you can become.